PlayStation 2 Proclaimed to be Second Coming of Christ
In accordance with declarations of Christian leaders worldwide, Christians have accepted Sony’s new PlayStation 2 (PS2) video game console as the second coming of the Messiah, Jesus Christ.  Christ first came to this world in about 6 BCE.  The PS2 was released in America on October 26.
   "I thought nothing of this gaming platform when I saw it on the news," said Billy Graham, world-renowned minister.  "Then it hit me.  All these people waiting outside for hours to get a chance to come in contact with the system were disciples.  Disciples of a higher power.  128-bit power."
   Christians look toward the PS2’s superior graphics and processing power as its "divine" qualities.
   "The images produced by the PlayStation 2 are unlike any other’s," said Archbishop Desmond Tutu.  "Sony’s Emotion Engine, with a 300MHz system clock frequency and a memory bus bandwidth of 3.2 gigs per second, is truly a sign that end times are here.  None of your pagan gods—Nintendo, Sega, whatever—can compare."
   Biblical experts have pointed out passages in the Bible which seem to suggest the holiness of the system.
   Matthew 24:30 states: "And then shall appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven; and then shall all the tribes of the earth mourn, and they shall see the Son of Man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory."
   "The ‘sign’ is the logo of the PS2, I believe," said Graham.  "The tribes mourning are the people who are unable to purchase the system because of low supply.  That cloud stuff is metaphorical, but the power and glory stuff is evident.  I mean, man, when a player in ‘Madden 2001’ falls face first into the grass, he may come up with dirt clumps on his face guard.  What more do you want?"
   The PS2 itself has a cryptic message for followers.
   "Well, it’s fourth and five at their own 30, so they’ll be punting this one," it said.  The console later added, "That’s the end of the first half.  The score is Broncos 14, Raiders 0."
   Scholars are still working on understanding the profundity of the doctrine.
   Although many Christians, along with other religious peoples, have accepted the system as God made human, the vast majority of Jews have not accepted the $300 PS2 as the Messiah.