The Rail:
As a senator, you pushed for a constitutional ban of abortion, and have
said that you oppose all abortions in which the mother's life is not in
danger. Could you give an example of an instance in which her life
would be in danger?
John Ashcroft:
Well, if the child is a minority, he could be a danger to the mother's
life, as well as the lives of others. See, I'm for minorities' rights.
TR:
That brings us to our next question. You have been criticized for
opposing the 1999 nomination of a black Missouri Supreme Court Justice
to the federal level. What is your response?
JA:
I'm not a racist, I just didn't think he was the right man for the job.
I enjoy the company of colored people very much.
TR:
Really?
JA:
Yes. If it's a crime to love niggers, then throw the book at me,
your Honor.
TR:
I'm not a judge.
JA:
I know, I was just say--
TR:
You have expressed an opposition to racial profiling. Explain your
position.
JA:
Basically,
I think it's wrong to discriminate based solely on the fact that someone
is black. I mean, spics steal bikes too, so we need a more finely-honed
system for catching criminals.
TR:
You also opposed a ban on assault-like weapons. Why?
JA:
Let me ask you this: How are you going to kill a deer or a bird without
an assault rifle? And what if you get mugged? You need something
to protect you.
TR:
What are your thoughts on losing the senate race to a dead man (Mel Carnahan)?
JA:
As Attorney General, I will have more power than I would as a senator,
so Governor Carnahan's death was a true blessing. But his wife, a
female, took his seat, so I guess it's a double-edged sword.
TR:
You once said that the U.S. "has no king but Jesus." Elucidate.
JA:
Well, he's our leader, you know? Making wine and bread, hanging from
that cross, INRI, all that. Hey, what did INRI stand for anyway?
TR:
Jesus of Nazareth, King of Jews.
JA:
Jews? I see.
TR:
You also called Catholicism a cult.
JA:
Yes. Is there a problem?
TR:
Not for me. Thank you for your time.