The Punkhouse Interviews: The Wallys

1.)Who the hell are you and what are you gonna give me?

James: We are Wallys and we will give you you an interview.
Chad: Do you have a hot sister?

2.)How can you sleep at night knowing that poor, innocent children are listening to your music?

L Hoopty: ?
James: ?
Chad: Kids listen to us!?

3.)Whats it like being one of the best (and only) true Ramones-core pop punk bands in Texas?

James: If it only it were true... You see there are these guys called the Koopas from the Houston area and they take all of our glory and all the chicks... If only it werent for those damn Koopas we could live a happy life..
L Hoopty: Also their are some guys called the NOGOODNIKS in Dallas, they have some weird homo sexual problem though.
Chad: Yeah they wont stop grabbing nuts.

4.)Who are some of your favorite bands, influences, ect?

Chad: I'm fond of the Groovie Ghoulies, Elvis, and the Huntingtons.
James: The Queers all the way, 50's early 60's music, plus I'm also a Mutant Pop monkey and the Connie Dungs rule the street... I'm going to start smoking so my voice can sound cool like Mr. Dung's.

5.)When someone comes to a Wallys show what should they expect?

James: Injuries, I shit you not... Both me and Chad being the dumb retards we are, have sprained our knees while playing, Chad is a little bit more retarded seeing as he sprained each of his knees on separate occasions... I swear to god if you see us walking down a street we look like a pack of crippled retards.
L Hoopty: Like the funny walk sketch from Monty Python.

6.)Have you ever had anything really strange happen to you at a show?

Chad: Way back in the day we had a full fledge boneified retard sing some songs with us.. I'm not sure what his real name is but he makes every one call him "Bad Dog". When ever he would hear rap music he would start busting moves and stuff.
James: Also in Springfield, MO. this old chick got on stage and asked if she could play tamborine for us.. We didnt have a tamborine so i said she could go go dance for us... tThe next thing i know, this chick who must be in her late 40's, is freaking dry humping my leg...needless to say it was the most actoin my leg has seen in along time.
Chad: Then James told every one after that it was his mom.

7.)Whats in the future of The Wallys?

Chad: Well were recording for two 7 inches. One on Paranoid Records and then one DIY. Its going to be called "the Baker's Dozen"... 13 songs, one record. James: Plus some day we are going to do a split with this band The Koopas. We are hoping to ride on their heels to fame and women.

8.)If you could have a dream job what would it be?

L Hoopty: We know every one is thinking sperm donor...
Chad: I want to work with the Jewish Mafia.
James: I would like to be an animator.
L Hoopty: working on David Lynch Movies.

9.)What are your smoothest pick-up lines?

Chad: Wanna go Commando with me?
L Hoopty: I dont think any of us are going to top that.

10.)Do you have any favorite TV shows or movies?

James: The best two movies of all time are Evil Dead 2 Dead by Dawn, Bruce Campbell is an acting god,...and the Back to the Future triliogy.
Chad: Kate and Allie.....James really likes Mr. Nanny with Hulk Hogan.
James: God how can you watch that?
L Hoopty: Too Close for Comfort.
James: Kate and Allie, ughhhhhhh.

11.)Any last words before I pull the plug on your life?

Chad: Can we have naked pics of your mom?
James: We are terrible at interveiws... we know.. We are touring for 10 days in August look for us in your basement and backyards. Thanks.

also:
You can get The Wallys 15 song cd, "This is....The Savage Young Wallys", by sending $7 bucks ppd cash, check....whatever to:
Chad Huffman
862 West Collins
Denton,Tx
76201

--The Wallys
July 1999



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