on
9/7/2002
Last week, the Space Toast Page presented an open letter to Hotmail.com...
An Open Letter to Hotmail
...regarding a new login screen, general functionality of the service, and detrimental changes made in the years since its aquisition by Microsoft. Unable to locate an address to send feedback to, admin@hotmail.com was tried. It failed. The alternate logical address postmaster@hotmail.com was tried as well, with the following results. Commentary will follow certain sections, hilighted in red.
From: "MSN Hotmail Support"postmaster_EN_SY@css.one.microsoft.com
Subject: RE: CST83115101ID - Recent changes
Date: Tue, 3 Sep 2002 10:37:39 -0700
Hello Spacetoast ,
Thank you for writing to MSN Hotmail. This is Erickson and I am writing in response to your inquiry. I know how important this inquiries are for you.
I am writing in response to your inquiry on your sent messages. I know how important this is for you. I am sorry but once these messages are deleted, they can no longer be retrieved in anyway. You can refer to the MSN Newsletter you received in your account. Starting July, sent messages in the sent folder will be deleted after 30 days. If you wish to save these mail, you can save it in you inbox or to another folder prior to the 30 day expiration period.
I appreciate your taking the time to send us your thoughts about the look and features of MSN Hotmail, and for your suggestions of any new features that you think are important to add to Hotmail. Although we can't respond to your suggestion individually, we review all feedback daily and your feedback is important to us.
We consider all of the suggestions and comments sent in by our members, and we maintain an internal database of suggestions that we consult and prioritize.
We are committed to upgrading the Hotmail system to improve our service to you, and you can expect to see many improvements in the near future.
Sincerely,
Erickson C.
MSN Hotmail Customer Support
I glad you know how important this is for me, Erickson. That was worth repeating.
The letter, as the reader will recall, addressed several issues. The lost Sent Messages folder wasn't even the primary complaint. What appears to have happened is that a "bot" -- that is, a small program on the server -- scanned my message and fired off the premade response that corresponded to whatever keywords it recognized. Either that or "Erickson" is a fucking imbecile, as testified to by the grammar in "this enquiries," but I'd bank on the former.
The following message arrived concurrently.
From: "MSN Hotmail Support"
***Please do not reply back to this message***
How did we do? What did we do well? Is there anything we need to improve on?
The MSN Hotmail Customer Support Team would like to hear how satisfied you were with your most recent support experience. We’d appreciate you taking a few minutes to click on our Customer Service Survey link below and let us know what we did well and where we can improve. Your feedback will help us provide outstanding customer service and improve your Hotmail experience!
Customer Service Survey: Click here to give us your feedback.
The survey came up in a new window, like all links from Hotmail messages. In a screwball twist, the message came up with the familiar "You are visiting a site outside of Hotmail. Close this browser window to return to Hotmail." vanity frame, even though I was still on Hotmail. There is no link to remove this frame.
Responses will follow their questions, in quotes.
Hotmail Support Satisfaction Survey
Thank you for taking the time to let us know what you think of Hotmail Support. Your feedback from this short survey will help us to improve our support and will remain confidential in accordance with our privacy policy.
Each question was followed by either a text field (if a response was requested), or a set of radio buttons, ranging from 10, "Very Satisfied," to 1, "Very Dissatisfied," with an additional button marked "NA."
Customer Service & Support
1. Thinking about your overall experience with Hotmail customer support on this particular issue, how would you rate your overall satisfaction with Hotmail customer support?
"NA"
2. What specifically contributed to your answer?
"The complete lack of support I received as a customer. One of the issues I raised appeared to have been crawled by a bot, and stamped with a readymade reply. The rest were ignored... by the bot."
3. Now thinking about your total experience with the support representative you worked with on this problem, how would you rate your satisfaction with this support representative?
"NA"
4. Do you consider your problem solved? (Yes/No)
"Yes"
The slow, cumbersome, and ad-loaded new login screen disappeared shortly after its introduction. At the time this survey was completed, it appeared to have been removed for good. It has continued to reappear, however, at no fixed interval, sharing time with the old login screen. Which will ultimately prevail remains, at post-time, anyone's guess.
Please rate your satisfaction with the following aspects of your support experience:
5. The ease of contacting Hotmail support on this particular problem.
"1"
Once again, I was unable to locate anything but an automated bug report form.
6. The amount of time it took for a support representative to first respond to your request.
"NA"
I remain unconvinced that any actual person has yet contacted me. Admittedly, "support representative" could, grammatically, refer to a computer system. Its purpose is customer support (in all its euphamistic glory), and it is a representation of a physical person. See several of the following.
7. The total amount of time it took to resolve your problem.
"NA"
8. The support representative understood your question.
"NA"
9. The support representative clearly explained how to solve your problem.
"NA"
10. The support representative was knowledgeable about Hotmail.
"NA"
11. The support representative was courteous.
"8"
The bot was in fact, courteous. Perhaps, for the sake of good habits, we should all be courteous to automated systems -- thanking your computer when it follows a voice command, for instance -- but that's another Space Toast Page.
12. While attempting to resolve your issue did you use any of the following self help features? (Help Link from Hotmail web site / Hotmail Frequently Asked Questions (or FAQ) / "Tips on Using Hotmail" link from Hotmail site / Did not use any of the above self help features)
The form uses radio buttons, not check boxes. Thus can only one option be selected, for some reason.
15. Why were you unable to resolve your issue using Hotmail self help tools? (I could not find any information relating to my issue. / I found related information, but it was not specific enough to resolve my issue. / Other)
"Other"
Hotmail Please rate your satisfaction with Hotmail as a product.
16. Thinking about your total experience using Hotmail, how satisfied are you with the product?
"3"
17. What could MSN do to make Hotmail a better product?
"-Prevent advertisement from interfering with ease of access (Hotmail Home, and the revamped, on-again-off-again mini-MSN of a login page). Advertisement is necessary to the future of Hotmail, and should not cripple it.
-Greatly increase the number of custom filters.
-Ban flashing/misleading ads, such as fake error messages and "You've won!!!!" This is a signifigant viewer-base for any legitimate advertiser.
-Add a suggestion box button. Secretly filter out messages with swear words.
-Allow an automated response to be sent from an address, upon receiving mail. Link this feature to the different reply-to address feature already existant. Keep both active for at least six months after an inactive address has been automatically deleted.
-Add an Ask.com-style "Remove Frame" button to the vanity frame that appears at top when one follows a link from a Hotmail email message.
-Automate #18.
-Least important of all, the trend today is to treat customers like dumb people who want to screw you. (Look at the record industry.) Don't do this. If it's a feature, call it a feature. If it's something you needed to do to keep the system running, call it such, and participate in -- don't merely tolerate -- debate."
18. Please provide your E-mail address:
19. In which country do you live?
Touch the Toast