OLD KING COLE
by Ian Robinson

Old king cole had a pain is his hole with two of his fiddlers three,
the third was allright aside from being full of shite,
so he decided he'd let him go free.

He called for the Prince, who was skilled in the art
of breaking peoples necks and ripping faces apart
then he called for a gun, a machette and knife,
and thought, after theyd done it,
he'd dispatch his wife.

so they plotted and schemed and stayed up half the night,
and called for the fiddlers when it became bright,
they hid in a doorway till the three entered the room,
and the king blasted the first who thought he was doomed
when he felt a warm mess oozing out from his chest.
but somehow he still stood, and he spun right around,
and clutched at the gaping hole in his breast.
the king was reloading, and the prince flanked around
the second and third ones with a knife in his teeth,
but the second ducked down and knocked the prince off his feet.
the king aimed at the second, square in the head,
but the shot richoched and hit the third one instead...
he went down on the tiles in a crumpeling heap,
"shit" cursed the king, "him, i wanted to keep"
"he could play the piano along with the fiddle, not like the others, whos noise makes you weep"
meanwhile the prince did not miss a beat,
clambering back up to his feet.

number one was in pain, and bleeding quite bad,
but the kings aim was awful and it was really quite sad,
the see a crazy old man and his crazier son,
staggering round the courtyard with a knife and a gun.
one looked at the third one, dead on the tiles,
and thought it was horrible, he could not help but smile,
three could play the piano, but he'd never shut up,
about girls in the taverns, who'd lap it all up,
when he sat in the corner and tapped out a tune,
while drunken old idiots filled up the room.

One grabbed a dagger from inside his coat,
while two dodged the prince, and the kings wayward shots.
heard the sound of horses trampling over the moat.
the queen and the princess had returned from the town,
where theyd been for a week in talks with the duke.
they wernt due home for an hour or two,
and yet, here they were, crossing the moat,
which distracted the king, who took a knife in the throat.

He fell to the cobbles and drew his last breath,
and the prince lunged for one, to deal him his death.
the prince slashed at him wildly,his eyes full of rage,
and two scrambled toward the kings lifeless corpse,
prised the gun from his hands,
when in charged a paige, from the queens entourage, bearing a pike,
and another with a longbow, and a third with a spike.
the queen started screaming when she saw the kings body,
all bloody and prone on the courtyard tiles,
along with the princess they could be heard for miles.
"my faithful husband, dead on the ground! quicky! quickly! i want those men killed!"
the fiddlers stand still while the pages surround...

One slashed with his dagger, but to no avail,
on a sharp looking spike he was quickly impaled,
two's head was hacked off by a knight with a mace,
and the royal women's screaming continued apace...

The queen sobbed over the body of her lifeless king,
layed on his chest, their gold wedding ring.
never did see, the knight with the bow,
taking his aim at the courtyard below.
one shot, all it took, and the queen she lay dead,
slumped over king cole with a shaft in her head.

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