The Princess looked into the mirror, she felt unclean, dirty, the lipstick she
was wearing was smeared all over her face..her mascara had run. She was still
sobbing, the tears were stinging her eyes, she could feel them falling down
her face, then tickling as they dropped off the end of her chin.
The unhappiness
she went through day after day, it was so unfair, they couldn't just leave her
alone, they made her do it, there was no way she could get them to leave her
alone, damn those voices. They were the ones who made her feel so unhappy, so
alone, they made her do those things.
She locked the bathroom door, and looked towards the floor. She sat down, pulled
her knees up to her chest and cried.
There was noone
she could turn to, she had no friends, the friends she had were too up themselves,
all they were interested in was money, boys and dancing. Everyone wanted her
to be like them, clones, all like one another, she wanted to fit in, she wanted
to be liked, she hated feeling like an outcast, but those damned voices, she
listened to them, obeyed there orders, they controlled her.
She thought and
thought and thought, so many things running through her head at once, she was
getting a headache. She often felt like this, too many thoughts and then a headache,
she usually slept it off, she felt a bit better when she woke up, but today
she did not feel like sleeping.
Strangely enough she just wanted to be alone, feel alone, she felt cold, unloved, the more she thought about it, the more the thought of death came into her head. This thought came into her head many times, but it was silly, why would she kill herself, things could get better, they could surely get better? Maybe, maybe not, what if they didn't, she didn't want to be this alone for the rest of her life, she wanted to be happy, and cheerful like she did once before. She tried to stop thinking, and got up and unlocked the door. She stopped in front of the door, "kill yourself noone will ever notice you've gone" "ssh" she said to herself,
"kill kill kill"
She wasn't going to listen to the voices, she started humming loudly so she could block the noises out.. but no matter how hard she hummed
"kill kill kill"
Somehow she ended
up in her fathers room, searching through the drawers, in front of her, a gun,
a shiny black gun, she felt attracted to it instantly. Picking it up she looked
around, there in the room was pictures of her mother and father, she felt a
tear to her eye, they wouldn't miss her, they didnt care, all they were interested
in was organising dances for there rich friends, they were a king and queen,
which mean't she was a princess, she didn't feel like a princess, princesses
are supposed to feel beautiful, pretty, important. She didn't feel any of this,
thinking of this, the thoughts came back, how unpretty she felt, noone would
ever love her, she was to ugly to find anyone who would want her, the voices
were right, die, get out, it won't get any better. As she looked around she
saw a pen and paper, she thought she better leave a note for them, her parents..
"Sorry, you made me do it. You didn't love me, I was never part of you" She looked at what she had put, she was filled with anger and hatred, she scrwed it up, she couldn't put that, so she just wrote "sorry, this is the best thing for all of us" She left the note on the bed, she pushed the gun up to her head, closed her eyes and took a long deep breath, one, two, three...she sighed,
"come on get a grip its whats for the best, they don't love you, noone does"
she cried, she knew what she was hearing was the truth, she knew they were right. she counted one, two, three, and tightened her finger on the trigger
"go on go on go on"
she opened her
eyes, tears streaming *bang* she fell to the floor, still with the gun in her
hand, she lied there lifelessly. Suddenly she shouted "freeedom" and stopped
breathing. *End*