Part 5

Shinya pulled another stuffed animal out of a cardboard box. He walked across the room to Toshiya and flopped down on the floor next to him.

"How many of these things do you have Toshiya?" Shinya asked as he held out the well-loved stuffed rabbit.

"I don't know. A whole bunch I guess." Toshiya took the toy from Shinya and set it carefully on his bed. Shinya moved closer to Toshiya, wrapping his arms around his torso and hugging him gently. His eyes caught a glimpse
of something on the floor next to Toshiya's knees.

"Is this you?" Shinya asked. He picked up the small wooden frame with a picture of a young, dark-headed, wide-eyed boy.

Toshiya nodded.

"Oh, Toshiya you were so cute! Look at how pudgy you were!" Shinya purred over the picture happily and threw himself across Toshiya's lap. He set the picture down and twisted around until he was lying on his back.

"Ne, Toshiya… what's wrong? You've been so quiet."

"I'm worried about Kyo."

"Why?"

"Well he and Kaoru-"

Shinya's face dropped abruptly.

"Don't worry about Kyo and Kaoru."

"But Kaoru and the green haired-?"

"Kyo and Kaoru aren't officially together."

"But they…"

"It'll never happen. Kaoru doesn't want to mix love with music."

"That's horrible for Kyo."

Shinya shrugged.

"Kyo knows what he's doing." He moved until he was sitting up. "Don't let it worry you."

Shinya crept around behind Toshiya and wrapped his arms loosely around his neck. Then he grabbed the picture frame from Toshiya again and looked at it.

"Gee, Toshiya. Who'd have thought that such a pudgy little boy would turn into such a sexy guy." Shinya purred in Toshiya's ear.

"Who knows?" Toshiya turned his head and gave Shinya a tender kiss on the cheek.

***

Toshiya shoved at Kyo's shoulder. It was three o'clock on Sunday afternoon and Kyo hadn't come out of his room since he fell asleep on Friday. Well, that wasn't entirely accurate. Kyo hadn't come out of his room when
Toshiya was up. He could hear Kyo wake up in the middle of the night and walk around the apartment.

Toshiya had gone in Kyo's room periodically to check on him. Each time he went in the darkened room Kyo was sleeping twisted in his blanket. This worried Toshiya. He worried about Kyo's health and his relationship with
Kaoru. But every time he thought about it Shinya's voice, in the back of his head, piped up and told him not to worry.

"Kyo!" Toshiya gave Kyo's shoulder another good shove. "Wake up!"

Kyo rolled over in bed and pulled the pillow over his head.

"Go away!"

"Wake up Kyo! We have a performance tonight."

Kyo sat up quickly.

"The live!"

Toshiya nodded his head as Kyo shot out of bed.

***

After his sudden burst of energy that afternoon, Kyo looked sleepy again as he sat back stage. He was in full make-up, sitting on a couch, smoking a cigarette when Die sat down next to him.

"How are you?"

"I'm fine. Why?"

"Toshiya said you've been asleep for the last two days."

"So?"

"I thought something might be wrong. You haven't looked so good lately."

"I said I'm fine." Kyo crossed his legs and puffed on his cigarette with a determined silence. Die shrugged and got up. As soon as he was gone Kyo stole a look at Toshiya, who was still sitting in one corner, putting on
his make-up.

Why was he so concerned? No one had ever worried so much about him before, not even Kaoru. The rest of Kyo's thoughts were cut off as he began to cough again.

Toshiya looked up and saw Kyo doubled over on the couch.

"Kyo-chan? Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Kyo choked a little after his fit. "I just-just choked a little on my cigarette."

"Serves you right!" Shinya chided.

"Aww, Shinya. Not everyone is as pure as you." Toshiya said.

Shinya blushed and giggled.

"Toshiya…" He said softly.

Toshiya smiled at Kyo before he left the room with Shinya. Kyo watched him leave a tiny pang in his heart. He began to cough again and threw down his cigarette, stomping it out under his heel. He needed to find some
water.

***

Toshiya leaned over his bass and a drop of sweat fell from his brow. It was hot and steamy in the livehouse. The body heat rising visibly in the strong stage lights. He craned his neck to the side and glanced at Kaoru.

Kaoru was sidling up to the edge of the small stage closer to the cheering fans. They had only been around a few months and played few lives but had already collected a number of followers. Toshiya narrowed his eyes when
he saw the girl with the green hair among the crowd.

Toshiya was getting more and more upset as the live went on. The green haired girl was standing right next to the stage now, batting her eyelashes at Kaoru. Toshiya looked at Kyo who was grasping at the microphone stand.
He glanced nervously at Kaoru as he sang passionately into the mic. After a moment he stopped paying attention to Kaoru at all and leaned over heavily on one of the monitors in front of him.

He crawled over the speaker, grasping at it and screaming into the mic. There was a musical interlude and then Kyo was supposed to come back in with the refrain but he missed it.

Kyo didn't move from his place thrown across the speaker. As he was known to be dramatic by throwing himself all over the stage the rest of the band thought nothing of it and repeated the last strain to give Kyo another
chance to hit his cue. But Kyo missed it a second time.

Halfway through the third repeat Toshiya knew there was something wrong with Kyo. It was obvious he had not been well for the past few days but despite protests from Toshiya and Die; Kyo insisted he was fine.

The mic fell from Kyo's fist and rolled along the floor, stopping just at the end of the stage. The feedback squealed through the speakers. Toshiya tossed the strap of his bass over his head and fairly threw the
instrument into Die's hands. He ran forward to Kyo and pulled him off the speaker into his arms.

Kyo's eyelids fluttered as Toshiya moved him. Shinya had rushed forward from behind his drum set and peered over Toshiya's shoulder anxiously.

"Take him backstage." Shinya whispered in Toshiya's ear, just loud enough to be heard over the buzz of excitement from the small crowd of people in the club. Toshiya nodded and picked up Kyo, carrying him to a small
backstage room.

Toshiya laid Kyo down on a couch so short that his feet hung over the side. His face was flushed pink through his pale make-up and his bangs stuck to his face with sticky sweat. Toshiya wasn't sure whether or not Kyo was
hot because of the temperature of the livehouse or a fever.

"Kyo?" Toshiya touched Kyo's cheek gently. "Kyo?"

Kyo open his eye's and looked up at Toshiya.

"Toshiya?"

"Yeah Kyo. Lay still okay? You just fainted."

"Fainted?" Kyo asked distantly.

"Yeah."

Shinya sat down next to Kyo, on the very edge of the little couch. He held a cotton swab in his hand with make-up remover on it.

"Ne, Kyo I'm gonna take your make-up off. Okay?"

Kyo nodded and closed his eyes as Shinya gently removed his make-up. While he was busy with that, Toshiya left the tiny room.

Standing right outside the door was Die, holding Toshiya's bass in one hand.

"How's Kyo?" Die handed Toshiya his bass.

"He's lying down right now and Shinya's taking off his make-up. Where's Kaoru?"

"Dunno." Die passed Toshiya his gig bag. While Toshiya carefully packed away his instrument Shinya stepped into the hallway.

"Kyo's got a fever."

"How do you know that?" Die asked.

"He's hot Die. That's what a fever is!" Shinya snapped.

Die looked at the floor.

"I'm sorry Die. I-I-didn't mean to snap at you."

"It's okay. Are you going to be okay alone with Kyo tonight?" Die asked Toshiya.

"Yeah. I'll take him home as soon as I get all of our stuff."

"Let me come with you!" Shinya begged Toshiya.

"No. I don't want you to get sick too."

"I'll be fine!"

"No!" Toshiya said firmly.

"I'm not some little child Toshiya! I know what I can and can't do!" Shinya almost yelled. He spun on his heel, ducked back in the small dressing room, grabbed his things and ran out a backstage door.

"Shinya's tense tonight." Die commented dryly.

"He is."

***

Toshiya stuffed his and Kyo's make-up boxes into his backpack before sling the bag and his bass over his shoulder. Then he picked up Kyo, who had been sleeping soundlessly on the couch, and clutched him to his chest. He
laced Kyo's arms around his neck hefted him up and carried him outside. Kyo's legs dangled like a child's and Toshiya kept kicking them against his own as he walked into the parking lot of the livehouse.

He walked over to Die's car, as the guitarist had insisted on driving them home, and laid Kyo carefully in the backseat. As they drove in silence, Toshiya glanced over his shoulder again and again to make sure Kyo was all
right in the backseat.

When they stopped at a red light, Die watched as Toshiya twisted around in his seat and reached back to tuck a strand of hair behind Kyo's ear.

"Sit down Toshiya."

"Sorry Die."

There was another long silence when Die's mobile phone began to ring. Die was to busy driving to pick it up.

"Toshiya, could you-?"

"Sure." Toshiya grabbed the phone off the dashboard and pressed the 'send' button. "Moshi-moshi."

"Die-chan?" A cheerful voice asked over the line.

"Uh-no. Hold on a sec." Toshiya gave die a curious look and handed him the phone.

"Moshi mo- oh hey! Yeah I know. No, that was Toshiya. Yeah, our new bass player." Die looked at Toshiya and winked. "No I won't be long. Kyo's sick and- no! Not Toshiya." Die laughed softly. "I'm taking Toshiya and Kyo
home now and I'll be there in a little while."

Toshiya couldn't hear anything of the voice on the other end of the line and tuned the rest of the conversation out until Die hung up.

"I will see you in a minute. Bye bye." Die pressed the 'end' key and tossed the phone back on the dashboard.

"Your koi?" Toshiya asked.

"Sorta." Die didn't say anything further and Toshiya wasn't in the mood to pry. He looked over his shoulder once more at Kyo before Die pulled up to their apartment building.

"Thanks Die." Toshiya said as he got out of the car.

"No problem." Die opened the car door, reached in the back seat and pulled Kyo out carefully.

Kyo's body was completely limp. When Die handed him over to Toshiya, the little vocalist's head lolled forward onto his shoulder. His forehead was hot, pressed into the gentle slope between Toshiya's neck and his
shoulder.

Die arranged Kyo arms around Toshiya's neck and gave his head an endearing caress.

"Are you sure you're going to be all right with him? Do you need me to carrying anything upstairs for you?" Die asked, one last time.

"No. We'll be all right. Thanks Die!"

Die nodded and waved before climbing back into the car and speeding away.

***

Toshiya flopped down, on the floor, with a sigh, next to Kyo's futon. He set down the small bowl of ice and towel on the floor too.

"Kyo?" Toshiya shook his shoulder lightly. Kyo barely stirred. His skin felt hot through the soft white pyjamas Toshiya had changed him into earlier. He thought Kyo looked almost angelic lying there like that.

Kyo winced a little, in his sleep, when Toshiya put the damp cloth on his forehead. He opened his eyes sluggishly and looked up at Toshiya.

"Kaoru?" Kyo said feverishly. "No…Toshiya." Kyo began to sniffle a little, two tears ran down his hot cheeks.

"Don't cry Kyo!" Toshiya pulled Kyo up and hugged him, running his hands along his back, trying to calm him down. Kyo flung his arms around Toshiya's neck and sobbed uncontrollably into his shoulder.

"Toshiya…" Kyo sniffled into Toshiya's shoulder when he finally calmed down.

"What?"

"Do you love me?"

"Do I-?" Toshiya held Kyo away from himself. Kyo eyes were glazed and sleepy. "You have a fever Kyo. You should go back to sleep."

"You don't love me?"

"Go back to sleep Kyo." Toshiya laid Kyo back down and pulled the comforter up around his chin.

"Toshiya… magic flowers and scorpions and…and…Christmas trees…" Kyo rambled until he closed his eyes and appeared to sleep again.

Toshiya sighed and leaned back against the wall. He wondered if Kyo was sicker than he thought. At least he was asleep now. He blinked wearily and looked at the clock. It was one in the morning. He was beginning to feel
sleepy himself but he didn't want Kyo to wake up again and be all alone.

Toshiya leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. He'd just rest his eyes for a moment.

***

Shinya twisted a lock of his hair around his pinky finger. He had been miserable since he came home. He felt terrible after he snapped at Die and even worse when he blew up in Toshiya's face. What was wrong with him? Was
he jealous? Because Toshiya was paying so much attention to Kyo?

No! Damn it he was not jealous! There was nothing to be jealous of. Kyo was sick and that's why Toshiya was paying him so much attention. And it didn't matter to him that Toshiya was living with Kyo. No, it didn't matter
at all.

Shinya sighed.

It didn't matter except that he was completely miserable. He picked up a pillow and threw it at his door when he heard a knock for the other side.

"Shinya?"

"What mom?"

Shinya's mother opened his bedroom door and peered inside. She picked up the pillow from the floor and set it gently on Shinya's bed before sitting on it.

"Are you feeling well dear? When you didn't come down for dinner I worried."

"I'm fine mom."

Shinya's mother gave her son another wary look before standing up and leaving the room again.

Shinya twisted the bedspread in his hands fretfully. Damn it! He had to go see Toshiya now! He got up from his bed, raked his fingers through his hair and grabbed his jacket from a chair.

"I'm going out!" Shinya called to his mother while he slipped on his shoes. He ran out the door slamming it behind him.