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If you know anything about college baseball players, you know that they are all a bunch of drunks, probably worse then any other college sport. Well I played baseball at a junior college that will remain nameless, mostly because my coach doesn't know about this. It was the last night that I was staying at school before I went home to Wichita, and there were only a couple of us left still in the apartment complex that had been leased to the whole baseball team. We went to the liquor store and bought about 4 thirty packs of keystone light and proceeded on getting really fucked up. Long about the time the second thirty pack was being opened, I should mention that there was only four of us, we decided to get out the video camera. After we were all good and drunk we decided that we didn't like any of the furniture that we had in our apt. So we decided that it would be a good idea to start heaving it off of my second third story balcony. We threw everything from dressers to kitchen tables to jars of jelly to even a VCR. We were having so much fun that when the sun began to come up we were in amazed. We decided that we should clean all the shit up, seeing how our coach was coming by in two hours to help us move out. When we went downstairs and came out the front door we were amazed to see a five-foot high pile of broken shit lying in the middle of the street. Well it took us about an hour to move all of the debris from the street to the dumpster in the back and the only reason it took this long is because two of our partners in crime had gone back up stairs and passed out. Needless to say all the beer was gone and the video that we filmed is the funniest shit I have ever seen.
Signed Jimmy Clements
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