LONDON (Wireless Flash) – British dentists’ jaws are dropping at reports of a man who lodged a toothbrush up his bum after using it to relieve his hemorrhoid pain. The British Dental Journal claims it’s the first recorded case of a toothbrush being used in this manner.

LONDON – Star Wars actor David Prowse is on the mend from a series of spinal surgeries. Prowse, who played Darth Vader with the help of James Earl Jones’ voice, jokes: “Maybe the Force was with me.”

MELBOURNE – Could drug rehab be the basis for the next new reality TV show. An Australian drug and alcohol rehab facility claims it has received three offers from TV producers who want to film a Big Brother-like series there. So far the rehab house has turned down all the deals.

LOS ANGELES – Singer Melissa Etheridge has been ordered to two weeks bed rest by doctors following a nasty case of influenza. However, Etheridge won’t be laid up long enough to miss her concert tour beginning August 4.

TOKYO – A Japanese company is combining good health and fashion with a new T-shirt that delivers a dose of vitamin C to the wearer through skin absorption. The T-shirt contains the same amount of vitamin C as two lemons and keeps its potency through 30 washes.

NEW YORK – Several Madonna items are going up on Sothebys.com auction block, including her resume and a 1981 rejection letter from Millennium Records valued at $3000. In the letter, the record company executive turned her down saying she wasn’t, “ready yet.”

VIENNA, Austria – An 63-year-old Austrian man was trapped inside a portable toilet for over three days after he fled from muggers. The man locked himself in the toilet for safety, but the muggers tipped the Portapotty over with the door facing down to prevent him from escaping.

DUBAI – A couple caught kissing each other goodnight has been fined more than $800 by officials in Dubai. It seems the couple’s on-the-street amour violates the country’s public morality code.

CHICAGO – If an assassin’s bullet hadn’t killed President Lincoln, his prescriptions might have. Scientists have just determined a little blue pill Lincoln took for depression contained enough mercury to kill him. However, Lincoln stopped taking the pills a few months into his first term because he claimed they made him “cross.”

KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia – The trained elephant that starred in Anna and the King, broke the rib of his trainer when it gave the man an amorous hug. A zoo director for the elephant said “Adun” has reached mating age and that his hormones got the better of him.